We often put our attention on the negative. I don’t have enough money, I hate my job, my children don’t listen, and so on. In his book What’s Going Well Greg Bell asks us to shift our focus to the positive. What’s going well? Bell discusses that what we focus on is what we see, and that becomes our experience. We all know that person who has nothing nice to say about anything. Bell calls these people negoholics. This type of person will find what’s going wrong over and over again, because that is what they have trained their brain to focus on.
Negative thinking and being can have long term effects on us and the people around us. Just like we have been conditioned, we can recondition ourselves to look for what’s going well. Take a moment and look around you, what is there going well in the here and now? I have a hot coffee, warm house, electricity, running water, etc.
What’s going well at work?
What’s going well in your relationship?
What’s going well financially?
When you read these questions you might hear your inner voice telling you all the things that are going wrong; my boss is stupid, my partner is lazy, I don’t have any money in savings. This is the thinking he’s referring to. These statements may be true for you right now, but when we focus here we are limiting our ability to experience what’s going well. Shifting focus can start to make noticeable improvements in our quality of life. It’s not always easy, but it’s worth the effort.